Men and sex….


What is it with men and sex? They ask what you want….you tell them, perhaps in explicit detail…..and they still do as they like anyway.


Seriously fellas……get with the fucking program!!


If she tells you what she wants, why is it so hard to just give it to her….yes double entendre intended.

Michelle Jenneke – Dance



Michelle Jenneke, a 19 year old Australian hurdler, has become the newest internet viral sensation.  While warming up for her heat at the IAAF World Junior Championships in Barcelona, the adorable Aussie shook her groove thing…..and even threw in some serious jazz hands… her ponytail swung in the air and she looked fit to burst with happiness.

Sadly, Michelle won’t be going on to represent Australia at the London Olympics next week but I’m sure we will see her in 2016. That is if the world doesn’t end in December.

So here she is….the funkiest hurdler in the world 🙂




Charlene – I’ve Never Been To Me


I have had this sung to me 3 times so far this week so….. I fear a heart would break if I didn’t post it.


Marky Mark & The Funky Bunch – Good Vibrations


Awwwwwwww come on, you KNOW you wanna jump up and dance like no one’s watching. So come on, come on……no one IS watching so get up and shake it baby!!!

It’s such a sweet sensation……


Hairy Legs…..

Ladies, have you ever been kicked out of bed for having unshaven legs?

And fellas, would you kick someone out of bed for having hairy or unshaven legs? I mean, the picture below is hardly horrific…

The Perfect Man??

What kind of man shares with you something like this?

So I know this man……I am going to call him Beautiful Mind for reasons which will become apparent very soon. Beautiful Mind and I are talking about our favourite movies. Yeah I thought it was weird too ha ha ha 😉 Anyway, I tell him my all time favourite is Apollo 13 because I always wanted to be an astronaut….and I still do hold out hope, yes perhaps somewhat unrealistically, that I will manage to be included on the Mars Missions. I confess that among other things, I am a geek girl at heart.

And he does not flee. In fact, he professes a deep love of geek girls. Smart women in general. Beautiful Mind is bored by….and I quote…. ‘half witted barbie dolls’. Hmmmmm okay. Men say this all the time to make them seem not shallow and into your mind and blah blah blah.

Now I have to admit, he has said this to me many times now. This preference for women who can talk to him, who he can talk to….who can carry on a conversation….who are funny and witty and playful….who can seduce his mind, so to speak. Maybe he is sincere. Is this the man we all dream about? Do I have myself a living breathing mythological demi god who genuinely and really and truly and cross my heart loves smart, clever women? I think I might.

I am dubious so I question him further. I begin my further questioning by apolgising for further questioning. Not a problem, he says…. your questions are more than welcome. We establish that he must be attracted to the woman….but I mean of course, that is just human nature, is it not? She must also be honest and truthful at all times. He is like me it seems……he can deal with a truth that will break his heart rather than a lie told just to make him happy. Oh there are some other things too but these are of a more personal nature and just for me 😉

Beautiful Mind informs me that his friends give him a hard time for his ‘beautiful mind’ thing. ( See! I told you it would all become clear LOL) Another quote….beautiful mind thing. I love that. I am getting a t-shirt made up. But he is adamant about his preference and refuses to budge even a little…so much so that one friend produced some def poetry about his ‘thing’ for smart women. Watch it below and listen to the cheers from the women in the audience.

The performer, Gemineye, is a spectacularly talented poet/rapper. I told Beautiful Mind that I now had a crush on Geminieye. I was being truthful. Whilst the truth telling was appreciated, the truth told was not so happily received. Lucky I was kidding 😉

My favourite line of the poetry?

” And as you laid by my side, I pushed my blinds aside and took the time in the moonlight of that night to count 72 eyelashes on the upper eyelid of your right eye”

Oh my……..

And back to my original question, what kind of man shares with you something like this?

Exactly! A pretty fucking fantastic one. And who is this man? I’m not telling…….this one is mine.

I think I am in love!!


Jolene’s Diary…. The 90 Day Rule.

Found myself completely amazed today whilst at work when two of my work mates gave me the most horrified look. I could only stare back at them stunned by at how stunned they were at me.. We were dividedly shocked….. So there we all were…… staring!!! Two sets of eyes on me and what seemed like one eye each on them.

The minutes passed by ( okay seconds ), and then then first words were exchanged.

“What???? you’d make a guy wait 90 days for it?”

” No way would he stick around”

My eye brows gave that confused “bitch please” look.

Wow!!… It blew me away.

They were dead serious, one a married 25 year old lady and one a 34 year old guy In a 2 year relationship….. I had just finished updating them on the stories from a “dating” site and one guy in particular where I had said I was thinking about meeting…..

Something was said that I just cant remember ( sorry for the lag in the story there) and I replied with “ no way, Im going to try the 90 day rule from now on” (and now switch back to the start with the horrified looks) ha ha I thought the were joking….

But nope.. they felt it necessary I should put a disclaimer of that on my dating site profile…lol 90 days….. is it really that long do I really need a disclaimer?